God Bless Alex and Stephen Kendrick

It's not often that something eye-draggingly lame comes along ....

And really inspires you.

Such is the case with a horribly-reviewed, thinly-acted, and monotonously-filmed "Fireproof."

Recently, my wife and I took a trip to the video store. We usually scout out some good "date movie" stuff (primarily something love-story-sappy or Adam-Sandlery-"funny") to enjoy while we cuddle up on the couch with some Sno-Caps or popcorn (and the dogs). Lately, I've been letting my wife do all the picking and, despite my desire to see "A Scanner Darkly," I relented. After all, "Star Trek" had just debuted and I'm determined to drag her to see it. I was recently tortured through "Marley & Me" (see previous 'blog about how big fluffy dogs make me cry) and "Nights in Rodanthe" (which I thought was "Nights in Rodan"--a Godzilla flick, which would have been SO cool) and, I figured, what could be worse?

Simple answer. "Fireproof." Never saw it coming.

I SO DID NOT want to see it. I had heard the horrible reviews, read the off-handed bashing of the overt Christian preachiness, and Kirk "Growing Pains" Cameron riffing. I was NOT enthralled, to say the least. I was even going to argue against it. "Come on, hon. Anything but that! How about 'High School Musical'?"

But I relented. I figured I had to build up a pretty sizable bank account to get her to "Star Trek."

Now, before I get to the heart of my review, I should point out that I am a Christian. However, I'm not a door-knocking, Bible-carrying, Jesus-is-my-co-pilot t-shirt wearing God jockey. I don't make it to church every Sunday, and--when I do--it's usually not without a groan or eye-roll.

But "Fireproof" changed something in me.

I don't know. Maybe it's because I'm easily susceptible, easily influenced by societal direction .... My boss tells me offhandedly that I'm not a good designer and my design skills plummet. The talking e*trade baby makes me laugh and I want to buy stock. I watch "The Biggest Loser" and I want to eat donuts. So it only figures that the Christian-message-pounding "Fireproof" would make me want to get closer to the Almighty. Which, in the end, it did.

"Fireproof" is about an Albany (is it ALWAYS sunny and perfect there?) fire chief named Caleb Holt (Cameron) who is having trouble with his disrespectful and divorce-demanding wife. Cathrine Holt (Erin Bethea) is the squeaky-voiced plain-Jane why-doesn't-my-husband-appreciate-me wife who suddenly goes cold following what seems to be yet-another-typical Holt fight about dry cleaning vs. dishes. Cathrine demands a divorce. Caleb agrees (after all, that means he can buy the boat he's hording the family savings for and spend his time at sea drooling over Internet porn). Story over.

Not quite. In steps Caleb's Bible-thumping pop (Harris Malcom) who throws The Book and A book at him. A hand-written diary called "The Love Dare" sets Caleb off on a 40-day quest of God-loving, butt-kissing, life-changing, habit-forming duties. His wife is almost totally unresponsive as she sets off to cheat on him before the divorce papers are even served (with a dorky doctor from the hospital where she works as some sort of nondescript administrator).

But, before long (what almost feels like 40 days later), she comes around. Not until, that is, Caleb discovers the secret of the Love Dare ... God ... and turns his own life over to Jesus Christ.

The tissue paper-thin acting and made-for-TV-movie directing leaves a lot to be desired--except for Cameron who does an admirable job of showing believable growth throughout the story. And why are all of Caleb's firemen cast as comic-reliefs? Even the acting from the extras is Christ-tinted. Case in point ... The firemen are called to the scene of an accident where two cars have crashed at a railroad crossing. In the previous scene, the accident is foreshadowed by the teenage boys in Car #1 pulling up to the teenage girls in Car #2 and the following dialog takes place:

Girls: "Look who it is." "Hi."
Boys: "Hi."
Girls: "Where you goin'?"
Boys: "We're just going over to the pizza parlor to meet some friends."
Girls: "Really?"
Boys: "Yeah. Wanna come along?"
Girls: "Sure." "We'll race ya."
Boys: "Really?" "Okay, sure." "On your marks, get set, GO!"

Cue the Mentos theme.

Really? Who writes like that in the 21st century? Gee, Davey, do you think it might be ... God?

"Fireproof" is as far from "urban reality" as you're going to get. But, it does an excellent job of diversifying the cast and making all the relationships believable. By the end of the movie I wanted to LIVE THERE.

The story itself is predictable. You know it's going to have a happy ending. All love stories do (well, "Nights in Rodanthe" has to be the exception--can't believe I cried over a Richard Gere flick). But something happens through the course of "Fireproof" that tickles your very soul and warms your heart.

Gee, Davey ....

We were probably a third of the way through when my wife turned to me and said, "Does this seem like a made-for-TV movie to you?" I almost said something comparing it an ABC after school special, but held my tongue. I agreed, but would have tackled her if she made a move to stop the DVD.

What makes the movie likable is the fact that it doesn't START as a preachy training camp for Jesus. It starts where most of us have been. It starts with an argument at home, a rough day at work. It's typical, simple, regular nondescript life. Cameron's character isn't even a church-goer (honestly, NOBODY goes to church in this movie--or at least we don't SEE them go to church). We're even lead to believe that Caleb Holt is something of an agnostic--maybe even an atheist--before dad sinks his gentle claws into the boy.

So we follow Caleb's "growing pains" with growing interest (eww, I know. Bad pun). He begins as the Everyman and we're curious to see if we would do what he does, how we would react, would we react the way he does? And the movie doesn't disappoint. Caleb's struggle is an uphill one. Catherine refuses to accept the day-to-day ovations Caleb offers and we find ourselves rooting for the struggling fire chief. We WANT to see him succeed. We want to see her turnaround, to see the eventual embrace and mutual forgiveness. And we want to cheer when it finally happens--though its coming is as obvious as a pillar of fire or a burning bush.

There are a couple of soft twists in the movie I won't spoil. And, like any movie, it's not for anyone.

But there are two major reasons that I will recommend it to everyone I know:

1. You don't have to be a devoted Christian to appreciate the tips this movie offers for "fireproofing" your marriage.

2. Even if you're single, the "fireproofing" tips can apply to any relationship ....

Especially the one between you ... and Him.

And that's what I'm up to.
See you Monday.
Swing by www.michaelrigg.com to see what's new with my writing.

Peace!

P.S. -- Rent this movie. Or, you can borrow it from me. I plan on buying it.